Wednesday, February 10, 2010

lit up.

9.35pm, 10th of February, 2010.
Listening to: 2pm ft Yoon EunHye – Tik Tok.

Lit Up.
I found him squatting down against the wall, a cigarette between his long, slender fingers.

“Ugh. Give me that!”

I reached for his hand, but he instinctively drew it away.

“Get your own!”


“For your information, I don’t smoke. And neither should you. Ever heard of emphysema? Or lung cancer?”

He raised an eyebrow. “What are you, my mother?”

“No, but I feel like I have to act that way since you’re such a kid!”

Catching him off guard, I lunged at his hand, successfully knocking it out of his grasp. A smug smile found its way onto my face. I couldn’t help it; he was just that slow.

“Hey! What the fuck!” He gave me a dirty look.

I walked off without looking back. “You’ll thank me when you realize that breathing fresh air is actually nice.”

Finally, I went back inside to join the others, leaving him sitting there, all alone.

“Whatever.” I heard him say before I shut the door.

Quickly, I took one last fleeting glance out the window.

Immediately after he had heard the door close, he lit up another smoke, letting the burning air fill his lungs once more. I turned around and walked off in disgust.

Disappointment. So this is how my parents must feel.

~

“Hey. You can have a cigarette if you want. I won’t say anything.”

I spoke quietly, careful not to say anything the least bit hurtful.


“Nah, I quit.”

My eyes widened. I turned to him in shock.

“Really? That’s great! Since when?”

He paused.

“Since you told me to.”



Behind the Story

Originally was written as part of another story which was never completed, and most probably never will be, this love story is one with a rough start, but a happy ending.
After meeting for the first time, the two don’t get along at all. They’re both somewhat sociopaths in their own way, [the girl not even having a relationship with her parents], but they both share the same obnoxious demeanour. Introduced by mutual friends, they have no choice but to tolerate each other. Over time, the girl subconsciously begins to have feelings for him, but keeps up her guard, because he is already in a relationship.
However, after vicious public display, he and his girlfriend break-up. After the fight, which the girl bears witness to, he leaves in exhaustion and she follows him, trying to cheer him up. For the first time, she shows a soft, passive side to him. When responding to her kindness, he reveals that he had actually taken the things she said to heart. Finally, he understands that he had always kept her in his mind and in his heart, from the moment they met.

‘Nobody knows;
How I want you like this every day.
Every time I embrace you behind the stage,
My heart bursts.

We greet each other awkwardly in front of people.
But when we turn away,
I'm the one who knows you best.’*

The song’s lyrics convey the feeling of loving the other person, without anybody knowing. In this case, nobody knows; not even themselves. But, the reason behind the writing of this story is to express the feeling when two people realize that they are in love. The pause before his last line is the sudden recognition, where the all the thoughts flickering wildly through his head come to a sudden halt; the dim light that was hidden away in his heart breaks out into a fierce flame and.. He sees her. He looks into her eyes; into her bare soul and, like a new shining star exploding from the apparent nothingness, he is lit up.

*Translation from http://eklyricos.blogspot.com/